Steve Pavlina – 3 Core Fundamentals in Personal Development with Steve Pavlina

One of the things I’ve been studied for many years are fundemental principles of personal growh. It’s been one of my priveledges in getting lots and lots of feedback from people through my websiteabout what growth-experiences theyíve been
having. And what struggles theyíve been havingas well. And Over a period of years, I began
to see a series of strage patterns happened. Like, Iíd write an article about improving
your finances, and somebody would send mefeedback and say; that was a really great
article, it really helped me with this relationshipproblem I was having. And I thought ìthatís
kind of strangeî. And then I wrote an articleabout health, and somebody would tell me how
much it helped them in business. And I thoughtWHAT? Whatís going on here. And as I followed
up with these people, what I found out isthat what they there getting more out of this
article than what I was sharing. They wereseeing something else that they needed to
grow in another area in life. And that gotme rally curious. So I started to ask the
question ìwell, what is that, what was thatmore general principle? Because then if I
could figure out what the more general principlewas, I could help people with articles not
just with their health, but with their finances,the relatiionships, career development, spiritual
development all across the board. So I beganthis quest, that took me about two and a half
years to figure out what these fundamentalswere. And I eventually got it down to just
these three simple things, and once I figuredthis out then everything else in the self
development field made sense to me in a wholenew light. And the great thing is that each
principle can be summarized to just a word. So Iíll share with you the three words that
you can basically reduce any form of selfdevelopment work to. Okay? So hereís what
it looks like. I like to draw it in a trianglestructure. So our three words are truth, and
this marker is a little dead there, let meswitch. And love. And this markerís even
worse. Love. Let me try this last one. And. . Power. There we go. Truth is basically a form
of growth where youíre trying to get newinformation. New knowledge. All these are
valid paths of growth. Youíve certainly seensituations where youíve gotten som piece
of new information and that was the trigger. It flipped a switch in your mindand you thought;
ah! This is what I needed. Especially in businessor in health, you come up with some new idea.
You encounter something you hadnít seen before,you try it out, and you see; ah, this works!
A new distinction, okay. Many speakers hereare speaking about truth. Theyíre telling
you some new idea. Some new way of lookingat reality. Some new perspective you hadnít
considered before. And this can unluck a tremendiousamount of growth. You can actually create
some amazing growth-experiences just by applyingthis one principle. For instance if youíre
suffering financially, and just say, let mejust take a look at what my financial situation
is. Let me look at how much in dept I am,and let me look at the information Iíve been
avoiding even looking at. Let me read somebooks on finances and books on getting out
of dept. You put together a process basedon this knowledge youíve gathered, and boom
youÊre off and running towards a greaterlevel of financial abundance. Power . Power
is all about aking action. And this is notpower over other people. Itís not control
over other people, itís you being able tocreate the reality you desire. You creating
the lifestyle that you wish to experience. Many speakers here also talk about power.
Now the most overlooked principle of personalgrowth that I see again and again, especially
in the personal development workshop environmentis love. So thatís what Iím gonna focus
on this talk. So because this is rather adifferent principle that most people are used
to, it might take a while to get into thismindset of thinking in terms of this principle.
Let me first explain what it is. The principleof love basically says that if you develop
a better relationship with the environment,including the peple in it, the places you
connect with, essentially everything you seein your reality. That we can think of as a
relationship. What relationship do you haveto life itself? If you can actually improve
that ñ everything else will get easier. Allother forms of growth will get easier. Suppose
youÊre an athlete. And you want to go outand become a sports star, and you have parents
that just donít respect that line of development,and they try to talk you into doing something
else, like becoming a lawyer or an accountant,that is going to slow you down. A lack of
social support in you environment will slowdown your growth. Sometimes it will just stop
it completely. If however you have a reallysupportive enviorment, say your parents say
yes we support you in this line of developmet,we want to be you to be the sportsstart you
wanna be, and their buying you sports equipment,and their hiring coaches for you and their
helping you out with your training, and theirjust giving you lot of ra-ra support, whatever
you need, weíre behing you. And they introduceyou to other people that can help you Do you
thik you will grow a little faster on thatpath? Do you think you will reach that goal
little more easily? Of course. What we constantlyoverlook though, is that we can actually conceisly
correct problems here. We can make deliberatechanges in our environment. We can change
the people we associate with, this conferencecoming together, the information thatÊs being
shared itís partly about truth. And power. Because youíll get people pushing you ìdo
this do this, go up and make approachesîand you hear stories of how people push themselves
in the power realm. One we donít tend tocover that much is the love ñ how we can
transform our relationship to life itself,and that that will smooth out everything else.
So if you find that the message of ìpushpush pushî yourself. More encourage. Go up
and talk to that person, even though youíreafraid. If you find that thatís falling a
little bit flat for you and you have a lotof inner resistence to going that route. Then
you might find that this principle is morein your liking. and that you can actually unlock
some really powerful growth-experiences, andthat this one backing off of this side. Backing
off the truth. You donít necessarily needmore information, donít neceserrly nee to
push yourself to take action more. But ifyou can make some tweaks to your relationship
and you r environment that alone can fix theproblems that youíre having over here. It
can make action much easier. For example ifyouíre in a very playful mood, youíll find
you can get away with saying all kinds ofthings. You know if you have a lot of social
support, when youÊre hanging out with friends,and theyíre encouraging you, youíll find
that Itís a lot easier to take action thenwhen you go out on your own, no social support
whatsoever. Makes sense? So
this principle here was the one I kind ofstumbled of when I seeked out people that
were having very fast breakthrough growthexperiences. What did they change? Yes, there
are a lot of people pushing on the truth andpower buttons but I found that the overall
pattern for people that grew tha fastest theywere definitely applying this principle of
love to some degree or another. They weremaking changes in theire environment to create
a more supportive atmosphere for whateverchanges they were going for. And the ones
who pushed mainly on this side of the triangle,just mainly pushed for more information, they
almost always got stuck and they stagnated. Or they just felt ìyou know, I have more
potential here, I can go beyond this leveland Iím just not quit getting there. And
they kept Do I have to push myself more, doI have to look for more information, you know,
more workshops, more more more of that sideof the triangle. And if they would just make
a few tweaks over here, all this other stuffwould get easier. Okay, so does that sound
kind of enticing to explore this side overhere? Yeah? Okey, good!